Rachel Sarah XO

Hey guys!

This month has been pretty bad in the way of anxiety and health things but it's been awesome at the same time and I shall explain why. 

So the month started off with intense anxiety about my teeth (super random, I know) but I've always been anxious about my teeth and dentists. I woke up one morning and my teeth felt pretty loose (they didn't actually move at all), but they felt really insecure in my mouth, I then noticed that my two bottom front teeth had shifted a tad. I plucked up the courage to go to the dentist, and my dentist diagnosed me with TMJD (Temporomandibular Joint Dysfunction), basically she took one look at my teeth and said "Do you grind your teeth?" and I was like "Mhm, yep" and she said "Yeah, you've got the typical looking teeth of a grinder." I also explained to her that my top two front teeth constantly felt like someone was punching my in my mouth and she said that it's a perfectly common symptom of people who grind their teeth, because you're putting so much pressure on your teeth when you grind them, it can cause problems to the nerves in your teeth or something and it can hurt even when you're not grinding. I wasn't even aware of my teeth grinding problem until my mum told me that when I fell asleep on the sofa once a month or two ago and she could hear a crunching/grinding noise, obviously it's gotten pretty bad if it's caused my teeth to feel so weird. I've caused some damage to the joints in my jaw because of the constant grinding. My dentist is making me a night guard though so hopefully when I next see her which is next month I think, I should be able to get my grinding under control. 

If you could see the state I was in the week before going to the dentist, I absolutely pity my mum. I was having panic attacks on and off for 5 days, I couldn't stop crying and I cried so much I caused my whole upper body (particularly the joints and muscles because of the tension) to be in pain for the whole week afterwards. It generally wasn't a good couple of weeks. 

But then things got a bit better! By the next week, my teeth were feeling a lot better, my pains had gone, I'm still grinding my teeth but I can't help that since I do that whilst I'm asleep but generally everything was a whole lot better than it was the couple of weeks before.

Things then got even better. I was invited to go to a job interview in Norwich (closest city to me, it's like 20 miles away) for a domestic abuse charity. The role I'd applied for was an apprentice admin and finance assistant. Not sure why I even thought that was a good job for me, I can't even add up but whatever, haha! I walked into the office building and signed in, waited in the reception area whilst trying my hardest not to have a panic attack, got interviewed by two ladies, and then got worried as the interview had only lasted 15 minutes which only seemed about 5 minutes as I was sat there. Got told I'd hear whether I got the job or not that day or the next day. Went back to the car park to tell my mum how it went (was pretty convinced I messed it up beyond belief), I then spent all evening waiting for a phone call. Hardly slept at all that night. Woke up at 9:30am, and spent all morning staring at my phone pretty much, then I finally got a phone call 3 hours later and it was the woman who interviewed me, I GOT OFFERED THE JOB, WOOO. Obviously I said yes! I've been unemployed for 9 months so I would have said yes to anything but this is a job I really really really wanted, so I was so excited. It's still a shock. I think I start on Monday 4th August, although I'm not entirely sure. I know I have to go into work then to discuss salary and the days I'd be working and what not, so that should be fun!

This month has been incredibly interesting, good and bad but I'm so exciting to see what next month is going to bring.

I hope you're all doing okay, let me know how your month has been. :)

That's all for now,
Rachel. xo